Nonphenomenal Lineage

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Some Demons

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Panda Cake I Made for Andrea
One of my demons, or a fun cake I made for a friend? Read on to find out….

I have been doing some thinking about the Taste Testing post I wrote on Friday. Health and fitness have been at the forefront of my concern for some 15 years, maybe? There have been times when I have been healthy and fit, but those times have been few and far between in the last decade and a half. And I can’t tell if it’s the media or not, but I’m really feeling like I need to make a physical change and get a bit healthier. Of course I always groan at the thought of leaving the comfort zone. However, I do like my plan of giving up things for a month, ’cause I know it’s manageable.

I’ve been trying to do better with the health thing overall, I started flossing (yeah, I know). I do alright during the day. But in the evening/night, the savage beast of craving (be it nicotine or sugar or alcohol or whatever) wells up inside, all strong and fizzing at the mouth.

I don’t know quite how to deal with this Jekyll vs. Hyde aspect of my personality, but for the record, I usually end up giving in to it. I want to try to evict Hyde from my mind and body. I don’t want any demons to control me, right? So these next few months are going to be an attempt at an exorcism.

Incidentally, I baked a panda cake for Andrea’s 29th birthday party this weekend. (No, I didn’t eat any of it, again for the record.)

I hate being tired and hungry and lonely and knowing I shouldn’t eat or smoke cigarettes to make me feel better. Wellll, I’m just going to go to bed and hope these cravings go away under the sweet blanket of zzzzzzzzz……..

(PS: So sorry if I mixed metaphors anywhere in this post, I have a feeling I did somewhere.)
Currently listening to Exit Music by Mark Ronson AND Violator by Depeche Mode


Written by pocheco

April 22, 2007 at 8:50 am

Posted in Uncategorized

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